This review is a little late, I meant to have it published yesterday, but I was busy watching Game of Thrones. I was far too into that show to motivate my lazy ass into writing this review. To make up for lost and/or wasted time, I'm going to make a video about Game of Thrones next week. Be sure to check it out.
And now onto the episode. Last episode, a girl named Heather came to Berk, she was a spy, Astrid had her pegged from the start, Hiccup handled the situation like a complete dumbass and lost all their documented Dragon knowledge to Alvin the Treacherous. Will they get it back? Will Hiccup continue being a dumbass? Will Astrid castrate him for trusting the word of a completely stranger over hers? Let's find out.
So the episode starts with Heather running through the woods, obviously trying to escape. She tries to make it to a boat, but it blows up. Astrid tells her that no one escape's from Alcatraz, and drags her ass back to jail. Astrid also gives Heather a verbal bitchslapping.
Heather begs Astrid to let her go back to Outcast Island. But Astrid is not Hiccup and therefore not stupid, so of course she doesn't let her go. Heather then tells Astrid that she needs to get back because Alvin has her parents.
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What? Are the writers seriously pulling this card? I'll assume they're not, and Heather is just pulling this shit out of her ass to gain sympathy and she's the same conniving bitch she was from the previous episode.
And besides, Astrid doesn't buy that bullshit. Hiccup probably would because he's a brainless idiot. OK maybe I'm going a little overboard with the Hiccup hate, but he dismissed the possibility of Heather being a spy for Alvin! He favoured a complete stranger over the word of his best friend/girlfriend!! He deserved every bit of my scorn then, and he deserves every bit of it now.
So anyway, Heather tries to bullshit her way out by saying she needed the Island to trust them, and Astrid says they don't. Not anymore she says, but she never trusted Heather from the beginning. And rightfully so.
On Outcast Island, Savage and a few lackey's have to retrieve the book from the clutches of a Gronckle.
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| You first, buddy. |
Back at Berk, The teens are training for combat with the Outcasts. They try out all sorts of tactics and tricks for roasting people alive. Hiccup praises the group saying they're gonna kick some Outcast ass! During training, Hookfang gets pissed off and Snotlout calms him down by hitting his horns sideways toward the ground. Remember this, it's important later on.
Fishlegs then points out that Alvin ain't just gonna hand over the book and going into battle would be a good option if they didn't value their lives. So Astrid suggests just letting Alvin just hand it over to them, and says he'll probably hand it to Heather. Astrid ain't suggesting letting Heather go by the way.
On Outcast Island, Savage delivers the book to Alvin. Alvin gives it a little read, but says he ain't believing it till he sees it. He asks what happened to Heather. Savage tells him she got captured, but Alvin clearly doesn't give two shits.
Later that night, the teens have a boat prepared. Fishlegs freaks out over the plan, but Hiccup reassures him. Astrid disguised as Heather appears and gets jumped by Ruff and Tuff who fell for the disguise. Astrid kicks their ass, calling them idiots for falling for her shitty disguise.
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| Sorry Astrid, totally unconvincing |
Astrid gets on the boat, and Hiccup tries to reassure her saying that they'll be shadowing her. Not that Astrid needs reassurances, but she gives a looks that says she appreciates Hiccup's concern. It'd be a nice little moment if not for what happened in the previous episode.
Back at Berkian Alcatraz, Bucket is bringing Heather some food, but he finds her cell empty. Worrying that Stoick will skin him and leave him hanging over the cliffs, Bucket opens the cell and investigates. It turns out Heather was hiding in the ceiling. She drops down and knocks Bucket unconscious.
You know, why would they leave a half-wit to guard a dangerous prisoner that's made numerous escape attempts? That's like leaving the launch button to a nuke with a monkey. Maybe that's why she escapes so often, because they leave Bucket to guard her. Idiots.
Heather then locks Bucket in the cell, and says she has to get to Outcast Island, and no quivering fool is going to stop her. She makes a pretty despicable villain, I'll giver her that. Bullshitting her way out of everything, acting like a snooty bitch to Astrid, using the boys dicks against them, the works. Especially that bullshit about her parents being held captive, I couldn't have come up with a better excuse if I tried.
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| The Devious Bitch! |
While that's going on, Astrid makes it to Outcast Island. Where she bumps into Savage and a few of his men. Astrid puts on her act, and Savage doesn't seem to know the difference. This could mean one of two things; A) He cared so little about details like her eye colour or the shape of her face to even take those into account now, or B) He's just really stupid. I'll go with A.
So Savage falls for Astrid's disguise, but he tells his men to get rid of her anyway. Astrid protests, but Savage says they don't need her anymore. Astrid manages to convince Savage that they may have the book, but it's useless without an experienced rider to interpret it. Savage falls for her little ploy.
Back at Berk, Heather goes to Stormfly as she sleeps. After a little trouble with the tail spines, Heather manages to gain Stormfly's trust again. She flies off to Outcast Island saying she's going to shit on Astrid's little plan and hand her over to Alvin.
After a little scene with Hiccup and the teens heading to Outcast Island, Astrid meets with Alvin. Alvin thinks it can't be that hard to use the book, but Astrid insists that he needs her to use the book properly. Alvin thinks it's just a ploy to try to keep herself useful.
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| I say that's bullsh............. Hey, you look different somehow. |
Astrid just tells Alvin to give it a shot if he doesn't need her. Alvin hands the book over to one of his men and tells him to test it out. The Lackey then gives it a shot, but he fails miserably. Astrid then has to step in and save his ass before he gets disembowelled. Astrid uses this as evidence that the book can only get Alvin so far. Alvin gives a look of reluctant agreement.
After another little scene of Hiccup and the others heading to the island, where they have to fend off Wild Dragons, Astrid is shoved into the Outcast arena. She demands Alvin hand over the book. Alvin is pretty reluctant, but Astrid manages to convince him. Astrid now has the book and all she needs now is a getaway ride. As Alvin is trying to get her to train a dragon, this is the perfect opportunity. She begs for it to be a Nadder, but she doesn't live in a perfect world. A Monstrous Nightmare comes through the gate, and she has no idea what to do. Alvins eggs her on, but she's finding it difficult. But she suddenly remembers Snotlout's horn to ground trick. She gives it a try and it works! She gains the dragon's trust and Alvin is impressed.
Astrid then gets on the Dragon and fights off some of Alvin's men. But as Astrid is about to fly off with the Book, Alvin presents....... Heather's parents?!
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| ... What?! |
Um, no. Just, no! The writers are seriously pulling this stupid card!! Astrid even can't believe Heather was telling the tru...... NO!! I refuse to finish that sentence!!! Did you see the way Heather was acting towards Astrid in the last episode? Hell, her general behaviour in that whole fucking thing! She was being a snooty, manipulative, evil cunt the whole way through and loving every minute of it. A GIRL WHOSE PARENT'S ARE IN IMMINENT DANGER OF BEING EXECUTED AND FORCED INTO A SHITTY SITUATION WOULD NOT ACT LIKE A DESPICABLE BITCH AND LOVE EVERY MINUTE OF IT!!!!!!!! GOD!! Fuck these episodes!!!!! Hiccup's an idiot, and Heather is now supposed to be redeemed because her parents are being held captive despite her loving every minute of fucking with Hiccup, Astrid and the rest in the last episode.
You know what, I think I know what this is. Those aren't actually Heather's parents, and Alvin is just passing them off as Heather's parents. He knew it was Astrid the whole time and showed them to try to get her to cooperate! Or perhaps they are Heather's parents, but they actually are aligned with Alvin! Alvin, you clever bastard!
After another little scene with hiccup and the others waiting on the Island for Astrid's signal, Astrid has to give up the book for Heather's "Parents", but she sets a trap on Alvin, getting her Monstrous Nightmare to breath fire at him while her and Heather's "Parents" get away. But Alvin is no fool and foils her trap. He then finds out that she's actually in disguise (he just pretends that he's surprised, he knew all along).
Hiccup and the others are still waiting for Astrid's signal. Astrid shows up with Heather's "Parents" and flies over to them. Hiccup asks who the other two people are, and Astrid says they're Heather's "Parents" and that she was telling the "Truth". The Outcasts then surround Hiccup and Toothless. Cue some sarcastic banter between Alvin and Hiccup, and they both set a trap on one another.
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| Come at me Bro! |
So Heather and the rest manage to fuck up Alvin's forces and put them on the run. As Hiccup orders them to withdraw, Alvin shoves Savage onto a catapult and fires him at Astrid. He shoves her off and they both fall to the ground. Alvin grabs Astrid as Hiccup pursues. Alvin then holds Astrid over the cliffside threatening to drop her. As Toothless is about to shoot Alvin with a fire blast, Astrid's Monstrous Nightmare shows up and saves her. She grabs the book and off they go back to Berk. Alvin takes note of how the dragon bonded with Astrid. He's now more determined than ever to get Hiccup and force him to spill the beans on training dragons.
Back at Berk, Heather "Thanks" Hiccup and Astrid for helping her get her "Parents" back. She gives Astrid a "Genuine" hug, Toothless a hug saying she's going to "Miss" him and Hiccup. Hiccup says a goodbye, saying that perhaps they'll see each other again sometime. I'd expect nothing less out of you at this point, idiot. Though to be fair Astrid has fallen for her scheme as well which she really shouldn't. Hiccup also tells Heather that if she needs help again, she should ask. Heather "Promises" to do just that. She gets on a ship and sails out of sight. When she's sure they are out of sight, Heather and her parents laugh manically yelling, "What a bunch of dumbasses! Alvin will be pleased with the info we got!".
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| You fools! You've been played!! |
Summary
OK, that last part never happened, but honestly it wouldn't surprise me if that's what happened. I cannot believe the writers thought they could redeem Heather when she was so villainous in the previous episode. I cannot for the life of me comprehend why a girl who's in a bad situation act the way Heather does in Part 1. She was practically revelling in her despicableness. I heard that Heather might be showing up in Defenders of Berk, which I kinda hope she doesn't, since that might make my little theory legit.
On the bright side Hiccup was pretty much back in character this episode, but I still cannot forgive him for ignoring a possible threat. But I'll put that aside for the rest of the series from here on, as he was just a victim of really bad writing in these episodes.
On the even brighter side, Alvin is showing himself to be a clever villain (though he does fall rather easily for Astrid's disguise). And I'm looking forward to seeing more of his plots in the future. Also the action and the comedy was as good as ever. And Astrid is once again awesome.
These were a decent pair of episodes that were just plagued with bad writing and poor execution. Hopefully the rest of the episodes don't fall victim to this.
6.5/10
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