Review: Game Of Thrones S05E03 - High Sparrow

This week on Game Of Thrones, Arya has some trouble fitting into the life of a Faceless Man/Woman. Tommen and Margaery "get it on" (lucky bastard), Margaery plays a dangerous game with Cercei, Cercei meets the High Sparrow. In the North, Ramsay Snow Bolton is enagaged, who's the lucky girl? None other than Sansa Stark herself. Jon Snow's new authority as Lord Commander of The Night's Watch is put to it's very first (and certainly not last) test. Jon handles it very well. Tyrion and Ser Jorah (AKA Lord Friendzone) cross paths. 



Warning - This will contain Spoilers from the show and books. 



At the House of Black and White, Arya's new life as a Faceless Man isn't as exciting as she thought it'd be. It mostly involves sweeping the floor, but Jaqen, or rather the "no one" who called himself Jaqen, says all men must serve, and Arya seems to just want to serve herself. It's great to see this actor back, and The House of Black and White just looks stunning. And in a rather ominous bit of dialogue, Jaqen reminds Arya that the one true god is death, just as Arya sees a man who was praying not even 1 minute ago lying dead. Later, we get a funny little scene where Arya's getting smacked around with a stick for calling herself "no one" when she's still holding on to her personal belongings. If Arya wants to be "no one", she has to give up everything. The scene where Arya throws away her belongings is heart-breaking. Or, not at first at least. When she throws away her clothes she's had since season 2, and her stolen silver, that was easy for her. Throwing away the sword that Jon Snow gave her, that wasn't easy. Watching Arya struggle to throw away Needle just hits you. The music, Maise William's performance, it's such a powerful scene. But, you feel glad that she doesn't throw it away at the end. That's one part of her that she just can't find it in herself to let go of. 

Meanwhile in King's Landing, Tommen and Margaery finally get married, in what is probably the only wedding in the whole series that doesn't end with a single death (a very dull affair by Dothraki standards). And then . . . AHH!! That lucky bastard!! Anyway, Margaery and Tommen do the deed, and Margaery begins to manipulate Tommen into sending his mother away. Cercei doesn't appreciate this one bit, and goes to visit Marg and her handmaidens. Lena Headey really sells that Cercei just wants to rip Marg limb from limb, and is only barely managing to keep a level head. The shot of her walking away as Margaery's handmaidens laugh is masterful. 

In Littlefinger's brothel, we get our first glimpse of religious hypocrisy, a rather hilarious one at that, as the High Septon (basically the pope for the Faith Of The Seven) role plays with prostitutes dressed as each of the Seven gods. Kinky old fuck. But in comes the Sparrows, religious fanatics of the Seven, to spoil his fun and drag him naked through the streets. After a complaint from the High Septon, Cercei goes to meet the High Sparrow, played by Jonathan Pryce. Stangely, I don't think I've ever seen anything with Jonathan Pryce before. But, he makes a superb High Sparrow, and his scene with Cercei is great. He believes that Cercei is there to arrest him, only for Cercei to reveal she arrested the High Septon. Cercei wants to hold on to power any way she can, and she sees the High Sparrow as an ally. The only other ally she has is Qyburn, who just gets creepier every episode. especially with FrankenGregor, who he talks to like his little baby. 

The Wall and Winterfell are continuing to be the most interesting storylines of the season. Stannis tries to renew his offer to Jon, but Jon is honourable to a fault. Stannis is disappointed, comparing Jon to Ned, and not as a good thing. Stannis may respect Ned for his honour, but he also realises that honour got Ned killed. Davos tries to convince Jon in another way, saying that as long as the Boltons rule the North, the North will suffer. And in the first real test of Jon's Authority, Janos Slynt behaves like a whiny bitch who refuses Jon's command, and Jon cuts his head off in what is probably the first execution in the show that feels satisfying, especially considering that Janos was a bastard-killer who himself was killed by a bastard. Poetic justice, bitch! So, we get the first happy ending wedding in the show, and we get the first satisfying execution in the the show all in the same episode. Stannis gives his nod of approval to Jon. They're relationship from the books is being portrayed perfectly, and I'm loving it. 

At Winterfell, Roose tells Ramsey that he has a bride for him that will solidify their hold on the North, and that girl is Sansa Stark. Now, I'm a book reader, but FUCK the books in this case! This is far more interesting than anything Sansa did in the books, and far better than having Ramsey's bride be a minor character we don't give two shits about. The fact that Ramsey's bride is to actually be a Stark sister makes me far more invested than if it was Jeyne Poole from the books. It only makes me want Stannis to win his battle for Winterfell even more, or Brienne to get to Winterfell to help Sansa, since we now have an actual Stark in a position to take back everything their family lost. A lot of whiny bitch book readers are probably gonna hate this change, but I for one am digging it. Who knows where this could go? Would you rather have Sansa sitting around the Eyrie doing nothing or Brienne on her oh-so-breathtaking journey around the Riverlands accomplishing nothing? That's what I thought. Besides, we would never get that amazing death-glare Sansa gives Roose Bolton or even Littlefinger's enthralling game of wits with Roose. 

Tyrion meanwhile can't stand to be in that wheelhouse anymore. Him and Varys take a stroll through Volantis, and get a death-glare from a R'hollor priestess trying to gather support for Daenerys. They then walk into a Brothel where a whore dressed as Dany is quite the attraction. Jorah just so happens to be in the very same brothel, no doubt being torn apart inside by the Dany imposter. But he finds hope in Tyrion, who finds he can't find it in himself to bed another whore. And by hope I mean kidnapping Tyrion and handing him over to Daenerys. 


Season 5 Episode rating: 
High Sparrow - 9.5/10
The House of Black and White - 9.5/10
The Wars To Come - 8.5/10

Review: Game Of Thrones S05E02 - The House Of Black And White

In this week's episode, Arya gets to Braavos and finds the House Of Black and White, AKA the home of the Faceless Men. Brienne and Podrick meet up with Sansa and Littlefinger. Spoiler Alert, it doesn't end well, or at least not in the way Brienne would have liked. Cercei receives a threat from Dorne (that I would love to see carried out to be honest) and sends Jaimie to bring their daughter home. But not without help from a certain former associate of Tyrion's. Cercei also fills the Small Council with yes-men, her uncle is most displeased. At the wall, Stannis tempts Jon with an offer he can't refuse, until Jon Snow is elected Lord Cammander of The Night's Watch. In Meereen, when a Son Of The harpy is caught, Daenerys learns a horrible truth from Ser Barristan. She takes a different approach to justice, but when one of her own council decides to take matters into his own hands, she must take yet another different approach to justice, one that will prove most unpopular. And she receives a visit from a familiar face. 


Warning: Spoilers (including from the books) Ahead.


So last season, Arya got on a ship heading for Braavos. In last night's episode, she finally reaches Braavos. We got a small glimpse of Braavos last season when Stannis visited, most notably the Titan of Braavos. Which still looks pretty damn good. Now we get to see much more of Braavos, which looks stunning. We also get to see the House of Black and White, which again, looks great. The man, who I'm assuming is supposed to be the Waif from the books, denies her entry in a great little exchange ending with,"You have everywhere else to go". I'm not even sure what to say to that. But Arya ain't one to quit so easily, sitting there for what seems like days, until she finally says, "Fuck this" and leaves. She goes back to her street rat ways back in season 1, and also runs into some assholes who want her sword. Maise Williams delivers a confident threat back to them that shows just how much her character's grown. But before she can cut some more holes in their asses, the Waif comes along to scare them off. The Waif then pulls his face off and reveals himself to be Jaqen H'ghar. I love that this actor is back, he's just too cool not to bring back. 

In the Riverlands, Brienne has her second run-in with a Stark daughter, when she and Podrick cross paths with Sansa and Littlefinger in a tavern. This is yet another meeting that never happened in the books (same with Arya), but it is yet another that I really wish did. Brienne just hopelessly tries to gain Sansa's trust, but Littlefinger cunningly points out all her past failures, such as failing to protect Renly and Sansa's own mother. Poor Brienne, always getting blamed for things that were beyond her control. But the nail in the coffin for Sansa was seeing Brienne bow to Joffery at the purple wedding, she rejects Brienne's service. Realising it's hopeless and that Littlefinger will probably want to tie up loose ends, she fights her way past the Vale knights and in a great chase scene, she kills Podrick's attackers and her own. She decides to just follow Sansa, since she feels she isn't safe with Littlefinger. 

In King's Landing, Cercei receives a gift from Dorne. A symbolic threat in the form of a dead Viper, a reference to Oberyn Martell being called the Red Viper, holding her daughter Myrcella's Lion Pendant. Cercei vows to burn Dorne's cities to the ground if they touch Myrcella, and exclaims loudly that she's Jaime's daughter. When Jaime reminds her that nobody can know she's their daughter, Cercei points out that for all his caution Joffery was murdered at his own wedding, Myrcella was shipped off to Dorne, and Tommen has to, as Cercei puts it, marry that 'Smirking whore from Highgarden'. Poor Jaime, just like Brienne, he's getting blamed for things that were far and beyond his control. But instead of doing what I would do, verbally and literally bitchslapping Cercei, he decides to go to Dorne and bring Myrcella back. But not before bringing Bronn along for the ride. Once again, total deviation from the books, but I'm digging it. Anything involving Bronn is gold, and it'll be interesting to see where this goes. Cercei meanwhile has an earful from her uncle Kevan about filling the small council with yes-men. I'm actually surprised the show kept Kevan in, and I certainly hope this isn't the last we see of him this season. 

As for Dorne itself, we get a pretty good introduction to Doran Martell as he argues with Ellaria Sand about avenging Oberyn's death. I'm not quite sure what to think of it yet, but it looks promising. 

At the Wall, Stannis' daughter Shireen is teaching Gilly how to read in a surprisingly good pairing that wasn't in the books. Sam at the same time is researching the history of the Lord Commanders of the Night's Watch. Probably because he's worried about Alliser Thorne getting elected, since he'll most likely send Gilly and her baby away. After a rather touching story about how two of Gilly's sister died horrible, painful deaths by Greyscale (the exact same disease Shireen has), Selyse comes in and spoils the moment. She tells Shireen to stay away from Gilly because she's a wildling. Poor Shireen, she's never allowed to have any fun. 

Meanhwile, Stannis has a meeting with Jon Snow about the burning of Mance Rayder. Jon Snow and Stannis' relationship in the books was one of the best things about A Dance With Dragons and it's translating very well to the screen. I also love how the writers kept Lyanna Mormont's "Bear Island knows no king but the King In The North, whose name is Stark". Stannis then offers to make Jon a Stark and Lord of Winterfell, because of this is anything to go by, he needs Jon. I usually don't care if the writers change things, but I'm glad those things made the cut. The election of the Lord Commander, while much less drawn out than in the books, is still a fantastic scene. Sam's speech and Alliser's rebuttal were great. But it was especially a nice touch when Maester Aemon cast his token for Jon to break the tie. 

In Meereen, Daario and Grey Worm seemingly catch the Son of the Harpy who killed that Unsullied last episode. Her entire council just wants to execute him, but Ser Barristan advises restraint, and tells Dany the truth about her father. This never happens in the books, or at least Dany never listens when she's told. But she listens to and believes Barristan, and decides to give the Son of the Harpy a fair trial, not wanting to be another Mad King (or Queen). But her former-slave councillor takes matters into his own hands and kills the Son. Now she must deliver justice to one of the slaves she freed, in a morally ambiguous and perfectly executed (pun intended) execution scene. As the crowd of former slaves turns against her, she learns that you can't please everyone.  I've been criticising Emilia Clarke's performance quite a bit, especially during season 4, but she's been doing great doing far. Especially when Drogon visits her. It's a wonderful little scene with a return of Ramin Djawadi's Breaker Of Chains Track, though the CGI isn't the best in the show. As daenerys tries to pat his snout, Drogon flies away over the city as Dany looks heartbroken from being rejected. Poor Dany, the one thing she needs most is flying away from her. 

Season 5 Ratings - 

The House of Black and White - 9.5/10
The Wars To Come - 8.5/10

Review: Game Of Thrones S05E01 - The Wars To Come

I have never done a review like the kind you see Entertainment Weekly do, reviewing individual episodes immediately after they air, but for Game Of Thrones this is something I'm going to be doing from now on. It's my favourite show on Television, it's back for another round, so I figured I'd tune in each Sunday and give my two cents on the episodes as they air.


WARNING: This will contain Spoilers (of course) from the episode and probably the books as well.


To start off, quite a lot went down last season, Tyrion killing Tywin, Arya heading to Braavos, Stannis arriving at the Wall, etc. and the premier of season 5 is mostly just setting the pieces and the board for the new season, but there's still quite a few powerful moments in it. 

I'd also like to mention that this is my second season going in having read all the books. A Feast For Crows and A Dance With Dragons don't have that great of a rep, considered slow, a bunch of build-up with no pay-off, and those criticisms certainly do have merit, I still loved the both of them though. As a matter of fact, the Northern storyline in Dance is one of my favourite's in the entire series! So how will this affect my viewing of the new season? If The Wars To Come is anything to go by, not much. It's telling the story more efficiently than Feast or Dance ever did. 

We got our first ever flashback scene with a perfectly cast younger Cercei, and a strangely cast Maggy the Frog (who was described as a ugly old hag in the books, but is actually decent looking in the show), in a scene that explains much of Cercei's disdain for Margaery. Both Lena Headey and Natalie Dormer have great scenes with Jaime (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau), Lancel Lannister (Eugene Simon) and Loras (Finn Jones). Cercei's conversations with Loras hopelessly trying to give Tywin praise, and a newly religiously fanatical Lancel are hilarious. And when Margaery barges in on Loras and Olyvar getting it on, I can't tell if she's annoyed by it, or is up for a threesome. I won't lie, I was hoping for the latter. At the end of it, Natalie Dormer delivers this powerfully ominous "perhaps" when Loras points put she'll be stuck with Cercei. 

Tyrion and Varys arrive in Pentos, and have what would have been the best scenes in the episode if it wasn't for certain other scenes. The dialogue between Varys and Tyrion is just brilliant, Peter Dinklage kills it as always. Varys also reveals his loyalty to the Targaryens to Tyrion, and suggests Tyrion go with him to Meereen. Tyrions asks him if he can drink himself to death on the way there. 

Speaking of Meereen, Looks like Dany finally decided to get rid of that Harpy statue from her new pyramid. We're introduced to an Unsullied who looks quite a bit like Grey Worm who heads to a Brothel. Where he is immediately killed to introduce the Sons Of The Harpy. Daenerys has a couple scene where she tells her council to hunt the Sons down and rejects a proposal from Hizdahr to reopen the fighting pits. I admit, I didn't think Emilia did all that well in season 4 (except for when she chained the dragons), but she actually did pretty well in this episode. Especially during her little bed talk with Daario and when she goes to see the dragons. Which are looking better every year. 

In the Vale, we're treated to Sweet Robin (son of Sansa's crazy aunt Lysa that got pushed through the Moon Door) practising Sword play and failing horribly at it. Yohn Royce thinks there's no hope for him, but Littlefinger tells him to man Robin up anyway. LittleFinger and Sansa are on their way West, to a place where Cercei can't touch Sansa. Apparently Sansa is going to Winterfell, which is a Far cry from the books, but fuck it. This is far more interesting. 

And Lastly, the scenes at the wall are fantastic. Like I said, The Northern storyline was my favourite from Dance, and the show is doing it justice so far. Jon's scenes with Stannis and Mance were incredible. Jon learned from Stannis what his plans for the wildlings are, and Jon tried to convince Mance to swear fealty to Stannis. But Mance was having none of it. Ciarin Hinds did a fantastic job, especially when Jon told him he was to be burned alive. Oh, did I mention that part? The burning itself was a fantastic scene. Seeing Mance's fear and pain as the fire engulfed him, and the reactions of everyone who watched, spoke so much about each character. Stannis seemed disappointed, and took no pleasure in doing it. His wife Selyse looked like she was orgasming to it. Their daughter was horrified.  Tormund (Mance's right hand) looked like he was about to burst into tears. And Jon Snow couldn't stand it anymore and put an arrow in Mance to end his suffering. A perfect way to end the episode. 

There wasn't anything really shocking, or all that eventful, it was just a "setting the board" kind of episode. But it had great moments, Mance's burning the highlight for me, and it promises plenty of greatness for this season. Bring it on. 

8.5/10

Disney Reviews: The Lion King (1994)

When it comes to popularity, the Lion King is the undisputed king of the Disney Canon.