Dragons Defenders Of Berk Reviews: Episode 6 - Fright Of Passge

Has there ever been an Astrid themed episode in this series yet? I don't ever recall there ever being one. The other teens got at least one, but never Astrid. Well, the creators finally decided to give Astrid her own episode, as well as a frightening new dragon to top it all off. 

It is night at Berk, with what appears to be the Northern Lights or something Lights, lighting up the black sky. Villagers are panicking, screaming the Flightmare is here. A couple of villagers blow a horn and come face-to-face with the creature, only they can't see it's face as its blinding light hides it quite well. One of the villagers tells the other not to look at it, not that he ever planned to in the first place. 

As the villagers scramble and panic, we see a younger version of Astrid holding an axe. This is obviously a flashback to some unknown number of years ago. As the rest of the village runs away with their tails between their legs, Astrid is fired up for a fight. She's clearly in over her head. Her uncle Finn stops her before she does something stupid, telling her that this isn't a battle for her, not yet at least. Wait a minute, Astrid has an uncle? Does she even have a mom or dad hanging around anywhere? Of all the teens, Astrid is the one who seems to have no family even mentioned once. We've broke some new ground here folks!

So anyway, Astrid's uncle Finn decides to face the Flightmare in single combat, like a boss! He's all like "Here I am you scaly flamboyant bastard! Come and get me if you ain't too much of a pussy!". The Flightmare shows up to carve his ass up. Finn stands his ground, but then he suddenly freezes up when he stares at the Flightmare for too long. 

Oh lord, what was I thinking?!

With "Fearless" Finn out of the way, The Flightmare proceeds to fuck some shit up and send the villagers into their houses, pissing themselves all the way. When it decides its bored of breaking shit, it takes off. The villagers are shocked that Fearless Finn wasn't so Fearless tonight and get into a heated argument over its implications. Astrid looks pissed, she lifts the axe. . . to do something. The Flightmare's gone, so I'm not so sure what she's gonna do exactly. But Gobber, who doesn't look any different than he did in the present, stops her anyway. He tells her that she's gonna need a hell of a lot more than an axe to do what she wants to do. Astrid looks to the sky an screams. 

We then cut to the present as an axe is lobbed into a barrel with a target. Astrid pulls the axe out and destroys the next barrel she sees. She asks who's next, Hiccup mockingly tells her that she got and destroyed them all. Astrid has been destroying inanimate objects all day, since the Fightmare is supposed to be showing up very soon. Snotlout jokes that Astrid is wasting her time, cuz when the Flightmare shows up the Hofferson's always freeze. 

Open your whore mouth again and the next one's
going into your head!

Hiccup tries to defuse the situation before Astrid turns Snotlout into a eunuch and tells Astrid that just because Arvendole's Fire (what I assume is what the Vikings call The Northern Lights or the Whatever Lights those are) will be lighting the sky, that doesn't mean the Flightmare will show up as well. But Fishlegs only makes the situation worse by confirming that the Flightmare is bound to show up. Astrid asks Hiccup "You were saying?", and Hiccup tells Fishlegs that his extensive knowledge of the Flightmare was very timely. 

Fishlegs doesn't get Hiccup's subtle "Shut the fuck up!", so he continues to tell the worst facts he could possibly tell about the Flightmare, including one about the dragon making its prey freeze. Snotlout uses this once again to mock Astrid's uncle and family, which in turn prompts Astrid to kick the everlasting shit out of him. Her family's honour has been destroyed by the Flightmare and Astrid's got enough on her plate without Snotlout rubbing more salt in the wound. But it's the Twins who rub more salt by barging in and telling everyone that the whole village is talking about the Flightmare and Astrid's uncle. Astrid decides she's had quite enough of these constant reminders from every asshole around her and takes off on Stormfly. 

Hiccup and Toothless find her outside Gobber's shop suiting Stormfly up for a Flightmare hunt. She's going to find the Flightmare and clean the stain from her family's name. She tells Hiccup that he ain't stopping her, but Hiccup never said anything about stopping her. Astrid gives him a funny look and heads off. Hiccup admits that he is there to stop her and tells her that he needs her and Stormfly there to protect the village. Astrid thinks she can shove her foot up the Flightmare's ass before it even gets to Berk, no protecting required. She tries to convince Hiccup to come with her after it, since Hiccup's probably been thinking about chasing it and training it. Hiccup tells Astrid that dragons aren't the only things he thinks about. Astrid asks Hiccup if he really just told her that with a straight face. 

Uh. . . yes?
Boy, this got awkward fast.

After that thought-provoking exchange, Fishlegs comes to tell Hiccup that he's completed the research Hiccup asked him to do. Hiccup once again tries to get Fishlegs to shut up but Fishlegs goes on to explain that he's found the Flightmare's flight path. Hiccup says that Astrid doesn't want to talk or hear of the Flightmare, but she actually does. Fishlegs explains that in order to get close to the Flightmare, you have to be stealthy, be as black as the night, and fuck it from behind with unrelenting fury. Astrid immediately thinks of Toothless. She hops on him and asks when they leave. 

Night comes, along with Arvendole's Fire. Gobber rings the bell for everyone to shit themselves and run! Gobber spots Snotlout and Hookfang just walking around casually and tells them to get their asses locked in a safe place. Snotlout refuses to, if the Flightmare is going to kill them all the last face he wants to see is Hookfang's. Hookfang is totally done with the soft Snotlout from the last episode though and playfully, or spitefully, tries to bite him. 

Snotlout then hears some random villagers behind him talking about some kind of emergency bunker. Gobber tells him that the Twins created some kind of Emergency Bunker, but it's been booked up for months now. Snotlout ain't one for stupid ass bookings though, so he's just going to force his way in. 

So the Twins are at their Emergency Bunker, which is just the cages at the Academy. As Ruff and Tuff are trying to come up with a confirmatory signal for those admitted that involves punching the shit out of each other, Snotlout walks in with Hookfang. Tuffnut stops him, Snotlout isn't on their list so he ain't allowed in the club. Barf and Belch act as their official bouncer. 

Looks like somebody's a little lost. 

Tuffnut tells Snotlout if he wants to get in, he needs to find a bunch of shit for them. Snotlout can't believe this bullshit, and neither can I. I ain't digging this subplot, so let's move on to the main plot. 

Hiccup and Astrid are trying to find the Flightmare, but Hiccup wants to be sure Astrid won't do anything stupid like try to fight it. They're there to observe and redirect the Flightmare and if all else fails they run back to town with their tails between their legs. Astrid gives a disinterested reassurance. Hiccup notices the disinterest and tells her to repeat herself only more meaningful like this time. Astrid's all like "Yeah sure, I understand Hiccup, whatever! Let's find that flamboyant bastard!". Hiccup does not feel confident that Astrid won't do something stupid. 

They continue on towards the Northern Swamp, and there they find the Flightmare. It's lights shine so bright that it even manages to temporarily blind Toothless. Hiccup observes that it certainly lives up to the hype. Astrid thinks this observing shit is gay, so she jumps off Toothless and draws her axe. Hiccup tries to tell Astrid this is a stupid idea but nothing will sway Astrid from reclaiming her families honour. She makes an admittedly lame badass speech to the Flightmare, who proceeds to shoot some kind of liquid shit that freezes Astrid solid. 

What was I thinking?!

With Astrid frozen in place and completely helpless, the Flightmare moves in for the kill. Hiccup gets to her first and gets her on Toothless. The Flightmare chases them but loses them in the clouds. The Flightmare admits defeat but screams that it'll be back. 

Hiccup tries to wake up Astrid and discovers that the effects of that shit the Flightmare sprayed are only temporary. He concludes that the Flightmare paralyses its prey and that Astrid's uncle wasn't some coward who froze from sheer terror. Astrid is now the one who's asking if they're going to run back to town. Hiccup says they're following the Flightmare. They do just that, all the way to some shiny river. Interesting. 

Back at Berk, Snotlout tries to get in the bunker with two Rainbow colored chickens but the Twins say he has to get more shit blah blah blah who cares? 

Fishlegs is at his house looking at a map, obsessively trying to figure out why the Flightmare always follows the same route every time it comes to Berk. It always follows the Northern stream to the village, why go along that same route every time? Why doesn't it approach from the South? Or over the hills, the forest, the mountains?!  Why does it consider the river to be the best route into town? Surely it would eventually try a new route, but no! It's always that same god damned route! What's the thought-process? What's going through that dragon's mind when it follows that river into the town? Why is Meatlug eating during such a time of mystery and intrigue?!

Dammit Meatlug! How could you be stuffing your
face in a time like this?!

Because it's the answer to your stupid question staring
you in the face! Idiot.

Fishlegs realises what Meatlug is trying to tell him and concludes that the Flightmare must be following. . .  

Hiccup finishes the sentence mid-cut with glowing algae. He and Astrid are still following the glowing river. They land and Hiccup comes to the same conclusion that Fishlegs has come to. The algae is shining as a reaction to Arvendole's Fire and that's why the Flightmare follows the river. Astrid is a bit confused, but Hiccup makes a comparison to getting in between Snotlout and mutton. The Flightmare thinks of them as a threat to its source of food and its very survival, just like Snotlout with the mutton.

The Flightmare sets down beside the river, forcing Hiccup and Astrid to hide. As it eats the algae, it glows brighter. It notices Hiccup and Astrid and is thrown into a jealous rage. Hiccup does some more unnecessary spelling out that they need to go get Toothless and hide. Astrid points out that that won't be happening anytime soon. 

What is happening to me?!!

Toothless has been eating the algae and now he's glowing, which looks pretty cool but does absolutely dick all to help their situation. Hiccup and Astrid get on Toothless and take to the air to hide in the clouds. They think they're well hidden in the clouds, only they forgot that Toothless is now a giant glowing night light. The Flightmare tracks them through the clouds and blinds Toothless with his light causing him to crash. Grounded, Toothless and the Flightmare get into a heated scrap. 

As Toothless and the Flightmare duke it out, Astrid throws some shit at it. Toothless and Hiccup retrieve her before she gets sprayed again and they hide in a nearby cave. The Flightmare loses them and with Toothless' cool ass glow unfortunately fading away, they follow behind the Flightmare undetected. Fishlegs surprises the shit out of them, bringing Stormfly with him. Hiccup wants to know why Fishlegs left town when the academy had to be locked down. Fishlegs came because he thinks he's found a way to stop the Flightmare once and for all. By redirecting the river with the algae into the sea. Which is an idea I find really questionable. I mean, they live on an Island and they're really going to redirect that fresh water into the sea? Why not just redirect it into the middle of the Island? 

But I guess fresh water on an Island in the middle of the ocean is really that expendable and the trio starts to build a new stream leading into the sea. Hiccup and Toothless build the stream while Fishlegs dams the river. The Flightmare knows they're up to some shenanigans and sprays the shit out of Fishlegs, paralysing him. Astrid faces down the Flightmare in single combat, but it manages to smack her off Stormfly. The teens retreat, leaving the Flightmare to guard the river. Astrid has an idea on how to defeat it. The dragons eat some algae and use their blinding light on the Flightmare. 

Feast your eyes on this bitch!

Ow, it's so bright!!

Using the Flightmare's own trick against it, the teens blind it while Hiccup finishes off the channel. With the river and the algae flowing into the sea, the Flightmare decides it's had enough of fucking around with the teens and chases after its food supply. The day is won and they may never see the Flightmare again. Only they may have drained off the only fresh water sources on the Island to do it, but they consider it a success and head home. 

Gobber is sleeping beside a catapult ready to fire at a moment's notice. Stoick notices some rather conspicuous bio-luminescent objects in the sky. He wakes Gobber up, Gobber accidentally fire the catapult into a barn and sounds the alarm. But the teens show up with their Dragons glowing. Gobber is incredibly confused by the glowing dragons. Hiccup explains that they are indeed glowing and more importantly they sent the Flightmare packing. Stoick brings the town out and Hiccup tells them everything they learned about the Flightmare, and confirm that Fearless Finn Hofferson was indeed fearless. Astrid regained her family's honour, there's a last minute on Snotlout's lame subplot, and we see the Flightmare soaring out to sea. 

Summary

Uh, not a bad episode but it wasn't really that good either. The Flightmare was a pretty cool dragon and there was some great action scenes. And there was little moment between Hiccup and Astrid that was great. But Astrid's story in this one was kinda subpar. It was a good plot for her, but I think it was just handled shakily and she said some really lame lines that were supposed to be threatening. 

And the subplot involving the Twins and Snotlout was not that funny. It just felt like pointless filler to fill the episodes 20 minute run.

6/10