Dragons Defenders Of Berk Reviews: Episode 19 - Cast Out Part 1

We're on the last two-parter of the season and the last episodes of the series (for now anyway). It'll be June soon, with How To Train Your Dragon 2 well on the way. So let's get this wrapped up, shall we?

Out in the middle of the forest, Gobber and a troop of villagers have catapults ready to fire. Gobber is stretching his old bones, until he sees a bunch of dragons coming their way, presumably to shit on their picnic. Gobber orders the villagers to fire! This turns out to be an exercise for the teens on how to deal with Catapults I suppose. Gobber's catapult malfunctions, but he smacks it until it works, nearly taking Ruffnut's head off. Tuffnut asks Gobber if he can do that again.

Hiccup decides that the shit's gotten too heavy and orders the others to retreat. Snotlout thinks that's a bunch of bullshit and moves in to take out the catapults. Hiccup tells him to get his insolent disobedient ass away from them, but Snotlout only lives to be a thorn in Hiccup's ballsack. He takes out a catapult that launches a boulder that hits Astrid in the head and sends her plummeting to her death. 

Nah just kidding, Hiccup manages to save her in time. Astrid wakes up a few minutes later and wants to know what the hell happened? Snotlout lands praising how awesome he is and what an amazing feat he just pulled off, completely oblivious to the fact he fucked up royal and nearly got Astrid killed in a Training Exercise of all things. Hiccup wastes no time in telling him what an utter, pathetic failure he is. And not just that, but he's a stupid, repugnant pile of shit that nearly killed Astrid. Snotlout brushes it off, Astrid looks fine to him. 

I'm gonna rip your balls off and stuff em' down your throat!

Hiccup's decided he's had enough of this bullshit, Snolout's also decided he's had enough of this bullshit. But he wants to know what bullshit Hiccup is sick of. Hiccup's fed up with Snotlout always doing the opposite of everything Hiccup says. Snotlout says he only looks out for he, himself and him. Hiccup points out that that is the problem, and that Snotlout's ass is suspended. To top it all off, Hiccup says Snotlout is also grounded. Snotlout tells Hiccup to go fuck himself, Hiccup ain't his dad!

Snotlout takes off on Hookfang, once again doing the exact opposite of whatever Hiccup says. Tuffnut is confused, because Snotlout is supposed to be grounded but what he just did is more like skying (Tuffnut's words, not mine). Astrid tells Hiccup that he didn't have to do that for her. Hiccup thinks that if Snotlout can't even follow simple orders during a fucking training exercise, he might fuck something up when they encounter Dagur again. 

Well, I mean there's plenty of times that Snotlout came through when the shit was down, but Hiccup does have a point that there's still a chance he might do something incredibly stupid one day that'll fuck them all. And speaking of Dagur . . . 

To any sane person, this would look queer. For Dagur, it's
just Tuesday. 

Dagur is talking to a picture of a Night Fury like a girl might talk to a picture of a hunk on her wall. His men find this to be totally queer, but they keep that to themselves, as this is Dagur we're talking about here. As Dagur is about to talking about ramming something up Hiccup's ass I'm assuming, Savage walks in and reports on the Dragon Root tests. But not before he has to correct his addressing of Dagur to 'You Derangedness". Dagur is pleased that the tests were successful, and Savage suggests waiting on Berk for the right time to plant it. Dagur likes it, it's so simple yet so . . . . . . . Deranged!!

At the Berk Academy, Hiccup flies in to find the Twins doing some work on Hookfang's old enclosure. Hiccup asks them what the fuck they're doing. Tuffnut tells him that since Snotlout was kicked out of the academy, they figured they'd tear down the wall between Barf and Belch's pen and Hookfang's, and perhaps do a little decorating here and there. In remembrance of Snotlout of course, he will be forgotten. 

Hiccup explains to them that he didn't kick Snotlout's ass out of the academy for good, he's just on temporary suspension. Tuffnut says that he doesn't really have much of a choice because of Snotlout's blatant disregard for Hiccup's leadership than to merge Barf and Belch's pen with Hookfang's. Ruffnut backs that point up, claiming his only other choice is total expulsion and losing the respect of the other riders. 

Wow, the first thing to come out of their mouths that's
not nonsensical drivel.

Despite what they just said making a semblance of sense, they unsubtly try to cover up the fact they just want to tear down the wall and put some decorations in there. Hiccup tells them they ain't tearing shot down yet! He'll talk to Snotlout when he gets back. 

Elsewhere, Snotlout finds a little Island in the ass end of nowhere and decides to call it Snotland. Hookfnag thinks this is totally lame. But Snoutlout thinks they don't need Hiccup and that stupid Dragon Academy, they've got their own shitty little Island now! Everything on it is theirs, the burned out trees, the rocks, all theirs! Hookfang at least enjoys burning those. Snotlout then points, unwittingly, to a wrecked Outcast ship. 

Back at Berk, Stoick is at the house holding an Ice Cube to his head. Hiccup drops by and asks Stoick how his day went. Stoick says it's been shitty, and being a leader can be a real bitch sometimes. Hiccup returns the sentiment, he doesn't know what to do with Snotlout, whether to kick his ass out, or to not kick his ass out. Stoick gives Hiccup some chiefly advice. Hiccup can't always be someone's friend and their leader at the same time, he's gotta make some tough calls for the good of everyone. Hiccup thinks on this nugget of wisdom. 

Back on Shitland, Snotlout cautiously closes in on the Outcast ship. He signals Hookfang over to him. With Hookfang as his big gun back up, Snotlout springs on the ship, and finds it filled with a big lot of jack shit. Snotlout and Hookfang look at each other in disappointment. Then all of a sudden, a couple tremors come out of nowhere. Snotlout blames Hookfang for bring them to an earth quaky Island. The Screaming Death shows up from under the ground to put that notion in the dirt. 

I'm back, bitches!

Snotlout realises that he and Berk are in the meat grinder, so he hurries off to warn everyone.  But The Screaming Death ain't having none of that shit, it's only interested in one thing; making Snotlout his bitch! The Screaming Death chases Snotlout and Hookfang around until Snotlout is knocked off and unconscious. As the Screaming Death moves in for the kill, a mysterious figure rescues Snotlout. 

Hookfang looks at the figure, who has the sunlight to his back, blocking most of his features. The figure flies Hookfang back to Berk, and presents an unconscious Snotlout to the town. The people wander of he's dead, then get excited at the prospect of Snotlout being dead. But Snotlout snaps out of unconsciousness and lets everybody know he's alive. This disappoints them. Hiccup and Stoick come to investigate, Snotlout says he captured the figure. The figure turns out to be . . .

Oh yeah, I'm back! . . . . Bitches!

Alvin The Treacherous is back, looks like Dagur's Skrill didn't kill him after all. Regardless, Alvin is placed under arrest and brought to the Great Hall to hear all the crimes he committed, Treachery, Attempted Treachery, Premeditated Treachery, Conspiracy to Commit Treachery, Sodomy, and Gobber decides they all get the point. The crowd cheers for Alvin's execution, but Stoick shuts them up. He tells Alvin that his ass is getting thrown in the brig until they figure out what to do with him. 

Alvin asks Stoick if they treat all people who've saved valuable lives like this. The Twins have serious doubts about the 'valuable life' part when dealing with Snotlout. Stoick doesn't believe for a moment that Alvin did what he did for Snotlout, he suspects Alvin has ulterior motives. You'd have to be a complete and utter fool to think otherwise. And indeed Alvin does have something in mind, he tells Stoick he has a proposal but Stoick ain't the least bit interested. 

Astrid and Fishlegs have come to inform Hiccup that Snotlout wokeup, and he said that Alvin wasn't the only big nasty thing on Shitland. The Screaming Death is back, and it's closing in on Berk. Hiccup is fed up with crap, but he knows he has to act fast. 

Back at the academy, the Twins are busy decorating Hookfang's former pen while Hiccup, Astrid and Fishlegs are busy practice scrapping and preparing of the Screaming Death. Snotlout then flies in and knocks Fishlegs down. 

Did you losers miss me?

Dammit! Why can't he just die already!

Hiccup tells Snotlout that he's glad he's alright, but Snotlout's arrogance really makes him reconsider what he just he said. Regardless, he tells Snotlout that he broke the rules and nearly got himself killed, so his ass is still suspended. Snotlout doesn't take this well, the Twins take it very well and go back to decorating. 

Snotlout thinks this is a bunch of bullshit, he found the Screaming Death and he captured Alvin the Treacherous! Astrid however points out that his stupid ass was unconscious the whole time, Snotlout says he was unconscious like a fox, which doesn't even make sense to the Twins. Hiccup tells Snotlout that this don't change shit! Snotlout is still suspended and Hookfang is getting locked up in his pen. Dagur watches this spectacle from afar, reveals his plan and unlocks a box containing a Dragon Root (the plant that makes the Dragons go nuts from episode 15 in case you forgot)!

Later, Hiccup decides to drop by the prison which is surrounded by angry villagers calling for Alvin's head. Hiccup heads on in and confronts Alvin. Alvin tells Hiccup the little proposal he was going to offer Stoick. Dagur is a loose catapult and off his rocker, he forced Alvin off his own Island and he wants that shit back! And he'll take it, with Berk's help. Hiccup thinks this is bullshit, why help get Alvin's Island back fro him just so he can get back to destroying Berk?

Oh come on man, I was a little pissed off, that's all.

For 20 years?

VERY PISSED OFF!

Alvin tries to make the claim that losing everything made him see things a bit differently, he's a changed man. Hiccup brings the conversation back to the proposal, he wants to know what's in it for Berk. Alvin says that the Berserker's will be gone, and the Outcasts will be their allies. An intriguing and very beneficial proposal, that is if Hiccup could trust the other party. 

Back at the house, Hiccup and Stoick are having supper. But Stoick notices the funny looks Hiccup's giving him, so he tells Hiccup to spit it out. Hiccup asks Stoick what Alvin did to get cast out of the tribe. Are we finally gonna find out? Not today it seems, since Stoick doesn't want to talk about it and gets really defensive when Hiccup presses him for answers. Stoick tells Hiccup that Alvin is their enemy, and that will never change. 

At the Academy, the dragons are sleeping peacefully in their pens. The Berserker's swarm the arena and open the gates. Dagur himself walks into the arena and signals to Savage to bring in the Dragon Root. With the Dragon Root in place, they open the pens and let the dragons out. 

FUUUUUCK YOOOOOUUUUU!!!

Back at Berkian Alcatraz, Snotlout decides to pay Alvin a visit. Snotlout tries to downplay Alvin's rescue, he could have gotten out of there himself. Alvin decides to go along with it, and even tells Snotlout they're both very much alike, motherfuckers don't appreciate the way they get shit done. Snotlout wholeheartedly agrees, and calls everybody stupid. Alvin asks Snotlout if he thinks it's right to let him rot in a jail cell, Alvin could have just left Snotlout to die, but he didn't. Alvin thinks that Snotlout owes him the key's to his cell at least, but that'll have to wait, as the warning horns start to sound. 

Hiccup wakes up and Astrid tells Snotlout that Dagur's been spotted by the arena. Snotlout runs off to save Hookfang, but not before Alvin tells him he can help defeat Dagur. Meanwhile, Hiccup sees the dragon root in the arena. He tells the others to go into the arena and distract their dragons, while Fishlegs and Meatlug jack the Dragon Root and haul ass out of there. Snotlout tries to tell Hiccup some important, but Hiccup doesn't have time for what Snotlout has to say. 

The teens head in to distract their dragons. Astrid tries to calm Stormfly, but she attacks Astrid instead. Snotlout and Twins aren't faring any better with their dragons. Fishlegs and Meatlug jack the Dragon Root and make for the gate, but the Berserker's close it before they can make their escape. Hiccup demands they open the gate, but Dagur surrounds Hiccup with archers putting him at a disadvantage. Hiccup wants to know what Dagur wants, but Dagur's goal has not changed. He wants what he's always wanted, the Night Fury. If Hiccup hands him over, Dagur and the Berserker's will leave peacefully. It's either the Night Fury, or his friends in the arena. 

Decisions, decisions, eh Hiccup?!

As the teens in the arena are running out of time, Dagur presses Hiccup for a decision. But Stoick, in a completely badass moment, makes the decision for him. They'll run Dagur through and open the gate themselves! With a small squad of Berkians behind him, he charges right into the Berserker's and kicks some ass! He reaches the gate and starts to open it, Savage is about to skewer him. Alvin however, kicks the shit out Savage before he can do so, and mocks Dagur for his mere existence at this time. Stoick throws Alvin a sword and tells him to kick some Berserker ass! Alvin Obliges. 

Stoick then manages to open the gate to the arena so Fishlegs can get out of there. Hiccup covers his ass while he books it. On the way out, Fishlegs accidentally knocks Stoick out during the skirmish. Hiccup closes the gate, as Dagur looks on and sees that his plan has failed. Savage suggests to Dagur that they get the fuck out of Dodge, but Dagur ain't leaving Dodge empty handed. Then he sees Stoick lying injured on the battleground, he orders Savage to follow him. 

The teens in the arena come out from their hiding places and embrace their Dragons who are pretty much back to normal. Tuffnut thanks Barf and Belch for not killing him, but he thinks they could have done with one less nut. Gobber calls Hiccup over to him, Hiccup looks up and sees Dagur and Savage with Stoick!

Nobody move! Or Stoick's ass is grass!

Dagur tells Hiccup they're leaving and if they see any dragon following them, rider or not, they'll be looking for a new chief. Dagur and Savage take their leave and say they'll be in touch. Hiccup makes a plan to cut them off at the beach and smash their boats to pieces before they can escape. Alvin advises against this, if they pack a man like Dagur into a corner, anything could happen. Dagur ain't gonna hurt Stoick, yet. Stoick isn't what Dagur wants. 

Gobber backs up Alvin's point, Hiccup asks Gobber if he lost all sense of reason during that skirmish, why would/should Hiccup trust Alvin? Gobber points out that if there's one thing Alvin knows, it's treachery. Hiccup takes Alvin's advise and leaves Stoick to Dagur, but he promises that he'll get him back, no matter what. 

Meanwhile . . . 

Summary

Well that was an awesome first part to the season finale, and it's shaping up to be an awesome one! Dagur, The Screaming Death, and now Alvin! Shit it's gonna be cool. As for the episode itself, it had a pretty good beginning with Astrid's near death experience. Hiccup had to make a big leadership decision and even had a nice discussion with Stoick about it. Snotlout was as entertainingly repugnant as ever. But the big surprise was Alvin. 

When Alvin supposedly died in A View To A Skrill Part 2, I was actually kinda hoping that would be the end of him. Put him to rest and let Dagur carry the series as the main antagonist. But, I actually loved Alvin's comeback. This one episode managed to make Alvin a far more interesting character than the rest of the series did. I'm looking forward to find what his backstory is. 

Dagur was as great as ever, and this lead to an awesome fight scene at the end. Dagur and Savage taking Stoick hostage has raised the stakes for the season finale. Oh, of course we know Stoick's gonna get out, he's in the next movie for christ sakes! But, it'll still be interesting to see how it all plays out. 

10/10

Movie Review: Pinocchio (1940)

Pinicchio, Walt Disney's Second Animated feature film. It's amazing what he could accomplish only three years after his first film. 

Dragons Defenders Of Berk Reviews: Episode 18 - Bing, Bam, Boom

Hiccup is overlooking what appears to be a giant, horn? Hiccup asks for Toothless' honest opinion on it, but Toothless doesn't think it's all that. Hiccup blows it off, Toothless will see for himself in a bit. In comes Stoick, who'll be the first Guinea Pig to test this device out. Hiccup calls it the Thunder Ear! In short, it's supposed to pick up the tiniest sounds from afar. This is for another attack by the Screaming Death, who we haven't seen in a good long while. What's he doing these days?

So Hiccup instructs Stoick to put his ear into the end of the horn and Toothless gives a signal for Fishlegs, who is miles off shore, to start singing 'I'm a Viking through and through'. Stoick thinks Fishlegs voice sound heinous, even from afar through the Thunder Ear. He wanders if this is all some practical joke, but Hiccup proves beyond reasonable doubt that he's not fucking with Stoick. 

Stoick admits that he's quite impressed, he thinks that this could even be used to pinpoint enemy ships . . .  though that thought will have to wait. As Stoick hears something else in the distance. 

Stoick! Pff, that joker? He'd be nothing without me.

Mother Fucker!

Aside from two-faced traitorous swine, Stoick hears something else on the horizon. He asks Hiccup to tell Fishlegs and Meatlug that they don't need to sing anymore, 'cause at this point he can't tell who sings worse. Hiccup listens, but he deduces that this is something else entirely. They decide to head out and find out what's causing a ruckus out there. But first Thornado has to make a cool-ass dramatic entrance with the sun at his back, something that Stoick never gets tired of. 

Stoick and Hiccup head off to find the source of the sound. On the way, Thornado gets a whiff of something and immediately heads in it's direction in a burst of speed. Stoick tells Thornado that he'll be doing the steering if he doesn't mind.  Hiccup tells Stoick to let Thornado lead the way 'cause he knows what's going down. Thornado leads the way to . . . 

Oh, how precious.

A trio of baby Thunderdrums are camped out on a rock. Hiccup wanders why they're out there all alone. The Thunderdrums then decide they want to goof around with Hiccup and Stoick and start flying around them. Stoick tells them to watch out and reminds their punk asses that he's a god damn Chief. Hiccup reminds Stoick that they're babies and baby dragons at that. They don't understand the concept of human hierarchy. 

Then they start to screw around with Hiccup and Toothless, Toothless runs away rather than deal with a trio of little Thunderdrum shits. Stoick thinks somebody has to let these little shits know that playtime's over. Thornado gives one good sonic blast that disciplines them. Hiccup is impressed, Stoick claims he taught Thornado how to discipline the younger generation. 

Now they've come to a dilemma, they've come all this way and found baby Thunderdrums who are all alone. Hiccup is about to ask Stoick something, but Stoick already knows what he's about to ask. It can't be done, there's enough racket on the Island with the Twins around. Hiccup just wants to be sure they'll be OK. Stoick thinks they'll be just fine, they're Thunderdrums! The toughest dragon in the archipelago, a comment Toothless doesn't appreciate. 

Fuck you say, Old man?!

  
Stoick is just like, "That's right, I said it bitch!". So they leave the Thunderdrums behind and head back to Berk where they meet Gobber. Stoick decides to toy with Gobber for that conversation he heard through the Thunder Ear. He puts Gobber on watch duty with the Thunder Ear all night, despite Gobber's plans to sing in the Great Hall. Gobber tries to get out of it, then Stoick unsubtly spills the beans that he knows about his conversation. Hiccup explains to Gobber that it was the Thunder Ear, Gobber has a different name for it. 

But before we can hear what it is, it cuts away to morning at the main household. Toothless and Hiccup are sleeping peacefully and everything is peace and quiet, until they hear shit breaking and feel large tremors coming from outside. Hiccup asks Stoick what's going on, but Stoick is just as clueless as Hiccup. 

They step outside to find Chaos, Anarchy, and madness! The baby Thunderdrums have followed them back to the village and are destroying shit and disorientating sheep and livestock. Stoick asks Hiccup if he still thinks they're cool, Hiccup's just on the fence at this point. Stoick tells him to get his ass off the fence and do something about those little shits! 

Fishlegs however is excited that there's baby Thunderdrums. He thinks their cute and tries to give them a hug. 

They're so . . . uidhfedhfudihfu!!

Ouuuuuooohhh, What hit me?

Hiccup decides that the time for fucking around is over, it's time to get serious. He tries chasing the Thunderdrums around town, but it only causes more chaos every step of the way. Especially in Gobber's shop. Astrid asks Hiccup if he's needs a helping hand, Hiccup most definitely needs a helping hand. He tells Astrid they need to corral the Thunderdrums into the academy. That proves to be a near impossible task as they're slippery little bastards. 

As if the situation couldn't get any worse, the Twins are now on the scene with Barf and Belch. Hiccup tells them that they need to stop them, but the Twins think they need to own them! But luckily the Thunderdrums give them the slip through trickery. Snotlout also attempts to catch one of them, but it also gives him the slip through trickery. Stoick complains that he always has to do everything himself, a lot Alvin did back in season 1. Coincidence? 

The Thunderdrums continue to cause chaos and there seems to be little the Teens' feeble efforts can to to stop them. But Stoick has an ace up his sleeve. He brings out Thornado, who manages to bring the little brats under control. Hiccup and Fishlegs are impressed, the little Thunderdrums are putty in Thornado's hands. The Twins immediately try to claim one or two, or the whole set of them. Stoick tells them to shut the fuck up and tells Hiccup to get those troublemakers off his Island. The Twins claim their mother will miss them, but Hiccup points out Stoick means the dragons. 

Oh, shit! Ha ha ha, almost had us there chief.

Hiccup tries to convince Stoick to let the academy train them, they're fast, powerful . . . destructive, loud, and out the fuck of control! As Stoick so eloquently puts it. The Twins say that Stoick's just making Hiccup's point for him. Gobber decides to throw his lot in with Hiccup, a squadron of Thunderdrums could be quite useful against Dagur and the Berserkers. Hiccup even reminds Stoick how great Thornado turned out. 

With all the evidence piling up for keeping the Thunderdrums around, Stoick gives in. But at the first sign of trouble, they're asses are gone. but Hiccup is confident that they can trained, and he already has a plan in place to accomplish this. 

- Let me guess, you don't have a plan?!
- Yes! No! Maybe. Ok, I don't have a plan.

Hiccup is absolutely clueless on where to begin with the Thunderdrums, Snotlout just wants to make them stop screaming before they blow their ear drums out. The Twins are facinated by this possibility and stick their faces in the path of the Thunderdrum's sonic blast. Hiccup tells them not to encourage them, but the others are not quite sure whether he means the Thunderdrums or the Twins. Meanwhile, Thornado watches this spectacle from outside, but Stoick quickly calls him away. You know, I'm really beginning to realise how underused Thornado is. 

Hiccup decides that the first course of action is naming them. Snotlout begs to differ, he thinks the first course of action would be to get them to shut the fuck up! Fishlegs manages to give them some dragon nip, which calms them down for the time being. Hiccup says they can't have them doing nothing all day, but Snotlout says that's what the Twins are for. The Twins don't appreciate that, since they already did something. When asked by Snotlout, Ruffnut is clueless to what they did. But Tuffnut explains they named the Thunderdrums Bing, Bam, and Lloyd. 

Fishlegs thinks there's something a little more logical than Lloyd, Boom. Although the Twins protest, Hiccup decides it's time to train them now. That goes about as well as you'd expect. Hiccup tries the hand on snout thing, but they blast his ass right into Fishlegs face and into Toothless' arms like he was a football. Astrid tries to get them to stay, but they swarm Stormfly and come back after she flings their asses off. 

Snotlout tries to get them to destroy something they're supposed to destroy. He sets up a bunch of target barrels and tells them to destroy the shit out of them, they destroy the shit out of him instead. Fishlegs tries to show them how to disarm a human opponent, which they do immediately. They steal his sword and Fishlegs tries to get it back. But they pass it to each other and it eventually ends up with Meatlug. 

Meatlug, pass it over here!

What the fuck?!

You too Meatlug?! Why are you doing this?!

The Twins tell Bing, Bam and Boom to repeat after them. They let out large belches that the Thunderdrums repeat, they seem to like it. Hiccup and Astrid want to know how this is helping, they ask how it's hurting? Then Bing, Bam, and Boom blast their asses into Snotlout, whose just finished rearranging the barrels. 

By the end of the day, Hiccup has completely lost control of the situation and Toothless is starting to get fed up with this shit. Hiccup uses 'excruciating' to describe it. But suddenly the Thunderdrums calm down and behave, looks like they've finally got through to them. Or at least, Thornado has. Hiccup gets Thornado to lead Bing, Bam and Boom on a lap around the Academy and has them well under control. Astrid says she can hardly recognise them. 

What have you done to them?! They're well behaved now!!

Stoick however comes to retrieve Thornado for Chiefing duties, Thornado reluctantly goes with Stoick, who compliments Hiccup on the massive improvement with Bing, Bam and Boom. He's gone with Thornado before Hiccup can tell him that it was Thornado that brought them under control, not him. Bing, Bam and Boom follow Stoick and Thornado out. Hiccup tells Tuffnut to make for the gate, but Tuffnut points them out instead of shutting the gate. 

The Thunderdrum trio are let loose on the village to cause more chaos. Stoick appears to give Hiccup shit, Hiccup tries to bullshit his way out of this. But after a death stare from Stoick, he admits he never had the situation under control. Stoick wants to know if they'll ever shut up, Fishlegs says that they will when they find their grown up voice in two years. 

They start tearing shit up once again, giving the teens the slip, blowing out Snotlout's ear drums and blasting a bunch of sheep that Fishlegs tried to defend at first, then decided he wasn't very close to anyway. Stoick and Thornado have to once again bring them under control. Stoick reminds Hiccup how he told him that he wouldn't be sorry if Stoick let the Thunderdrums stay. Well, Stoick is very sorry and decides the Thunderdrums have to go. 

So Hiccup and the gang bring Bing, Bam and Boom to Dragon Island. 

Here there's plenty of dragons to anno. . . I mean meet!

Although Hiccup explains to them how awesome Dragon Island is, he's finding it hard to reject their cute little faces. The Twins think this is sad, and recall the time their dad took their pet Yak Sam to go live on a farm. Though they also recall the delicious Yak steaks they had the day after. Snotlout decides to get the ball rolling on leaving, then they all take to the air. 

Hiccup and Fishlegs along the way try to convince themselves that they did the right thing. Hiccup says they could even visit them whenever they want. Tuffnut points out they could, but Bing, Bam, and Boom won't be there, since they're right behind them. Snotlout thinks they need to ditch them, so he heads back to Dragon Island and loses them in the cave. He mocks them for being stupid, right before they come up behind him and blast him off Hookfang. Astrid thinks they should try Snotlout's plan again. 

Next Hiccup and Astrid try feeding them fish, then while they're distracted, make a break for it and take the long way home. The first person they meet when they get back is Stoick. 

We're Back!!

OH. FOR. FUCK. SAKE!!

Stoick decides that these so called "Dragon Geniuses" need a hand from him and Thornado. So they head back to Dragon Island, this time with Thornado to keep them in check. Stoick thinks that sometime's you just have to show Teenagers tough love. 

So Hiccup has to go through the whole you gotta stay here routine. Only this time Bing Bam and Boom start making sad faces at him and whimpering. Hiccup asks them to stop it, they're tearing his heart out and making it harder than it already is. Stoick decides to let Thornado have a word with them. Thornado roars at them and they stay when they get left behind this time. 

Hiccup looks back but Stoick tells him not to, tough love he says. But Thornado smells danger afoot and immediately turns around against Stoick's orders. Back at the beach, Bing Bam and Boom are being surrounded and antagonised by wild dragons. They suddenly realise why they found the Thunderdrums in the middle of the ocean, they must have been chased off Dragon Island by dragons who don't appreciate their kind. Stoick decides to go in and help Bing Bam and Boom. 

Bing Bam and Boom are being cornered by a Zippleback, a Monstrous Nightmare and the Punk Ass Nadder?

Wait, this one's red, never mind. 

No matter where the Thunderdrum trio goes, there's always some pissed off dragon wanting to kick their ass. As a Monstrous Nightmare closes in for the kill, Thornado blasts that bitch out of the sky. Stoick and Thornado then charge at the other three dragons. Hiccup and Fishlegs take care of a couple that sneak up after Thornado and Stoick. 

As the trio takes care of each dragon, two more keep popping up to replace them, including the Punk Ass Nadder!

Surrounded by insurmountable odds, Thornado coordinates a plan with Bing, Bam and Boom. Stoick warns Hiccup and Fishlegs to cover their ears, as their about to get an earful of Thunderdrum sonic blast. Thornado and the babies use their combined sonic blasts to knock all the hostile wild dragons out of the sky. Hiccup thinks that taught them, but Fishlegs points out that's only for now. The wild dragons ain't gonna fuck off any time soon. Hiccup doesn't even know what to do with Bing, Bam and Boom. They can't take them back to Berk, but they can't leave them there to die. 

Stoick makes a big decision, he decides to set Thornado free. He realises that the babies won't survive without him, so he'll leave Thornado behind to look after him. In a tearjerker moment, Stoick says goodbye to Thornado. 

As Hiccup, Fishlegs and Stoick take off from Dragon island, Hiccup tells Stoick that he did the right thing. Stoick turns around for one last goodbye as they fly away. 

Summary

That ending alone rewards this episode a 10/10 for me! Thornado truly is the most underused dragon in the entire show, but we finally got an episode where he was the focus. But it unfortunately turned out to be his departure as well. Which is a real shame and somewhat illogical too. If Stoick was willing to give up Thornado, why didn't they just bring Bing Bam and Boom back to Berk and Thornado could keep them in check. Or what about Thornado's purple friend that was with him back in How to Pick Your Dragon? There's plenty of logical solutions to this problem, but this still doesn't make that good bye at the end any less sad. 

And this was by far one of the most spot on episodes when it comes to comedy. Everything with Bing, Bam and Boom was just hilarious (and the little guys were really cute too). Every joke, every failed attempt to train/contain them, every time they were just spreading chaos got a laugh out of me. Meatlug joining in on passing Fishlegs' sword around was gut busting (why not make Meatlug their surrogate mother? She seemed to get on with them well enough). 

And there was a great fight scene at the end with a ton of wild dragons that led to that incredible end. This is one of the best episodes, better than The Night And The Fury? Possibly, this is the only episode that managed to make me tear up a bit. If that doesn't count it as one of the best, nothing will. 

10/10

Dragons Defenders Of Berk Reviews: Episode 17 - Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

It's a foggy day on Berk, Fishlegs jumps in eager anticipation. He yells out that Trader Johann has arrived and quickly boards his ship. Snotlout is not so eager because Johann probably won't let him touch half the cool shit he's got! Hiccup reminds him that's because half the shit he touched ended up broken. Snotlout claims that a bunch of bullshit, it's his word against Johann's. Who are ya gonna trust?

Johann goes through the whole Berk is the best place I've been to shtick and does his business. He shows Fishlegs some rare pearls, Snotlout tells Astrid they can be hers, all she has to do is say the word. Her response is 'Yuck!'. Gobber's looking for something a little different, he tells Johann to make him an offer he can't refuse. Johann looks around for something that'll blow him away, but Gobber finds a pile of scrap metal and is willing to trade for it. 

Tuffnut has found the best Mace he's ever laid eyes on. 

I will call her, Macey! You like that name?

Astrid finds Tuffnut's crush on a mace disturbing. While Gobber and Johann finalise the trade for the Scrap Metal, Toothless gets a good whiff of it. He doesn't like what he smells. Then out of nowhere,  a large crash is heard at the back of the boat. Snotlout is standing beside a ton of broken shit, he claims he didn't do it and walks away. Johann curses at Snotlout and threatens to make a winter coat out of his skin. 

Gobber asks for help from the teens to bring his big ass pile of Scrap metal to his shop. Hiccup gets Astrid, Fishlegs and the Twins on the job. Gobber refuses to let Snotlout help, he's worried Snotlout will drop it in the ocean. The others bring the scrap metal to Gobber's shop, but Toothless ain't liking this at all. 

And for good reason. During the night, a large, familiar looking cloud of fog is moving through the village. In the morning, Hiccup and Toothless are on a little stroll through town, and walk into an agitated village. He meets the others and asks them what's going on. They tell him a whole lot of shit got jacked the night before. Some are taking it very hard. 

Maaaaaaccceeeey!! Maaaaaaceeeeeey!!

Some far more than others. Stoick realises they have quite the situation on their hands. Hiccup tries to put the pieces together. All the things that are missing are axes, shields, and drinking goblets. What do they all have in common? Snotlout's thinks 'that they're all gone!' is a reasonable guess. Hiccup corrects his painfully obvious guess, what they all have in common is that they're all metal. Hiccup has a theory that he's not going to share just yet. 

Gobber informs Stoick that Bucket and Mulch are beating each other with Sturgeons, since their bludgeons have been stolen. Stoick suggests that actually may be for the best in this case. Hiccup tells Stoick to deal with the Sturgeon problem, him and Astrid will go CSI up in this bitch and do some investigating. 

They decide to search Gobber's shop first, since that area has the highest concentration of metal on the island. Hiccup asks Gobber if any suspicious persons have been seen around the premises in the last few days. Gobber says that his business has been booming, since it's only 41 days till Snoggletog. That doesn't help much, as any of those people could have been their suspected metal thief. With no footprints, there's nothing to go on aside from the missing metal. Gobber promises them that Metal Thief ain't gonna get the best of him!

Oh shit!

Next, Hiccup and Astrid pay the Twins a visit. Tuffnut shows them an later her made for his mace, covered in flowers and a few pots. He claimed that's where he left her when she went "missing", he looks at Ruffnut when he says "missing". Ruffnut claims that she never took his stupid ass mace. Tuffnut looks at the alter and remembers how Macey would watch the sunset there, or the wall depending on what side he left her on. Hiccup and Astrid think this is totally queer, even for the Twins. Ruffnut demands they leave her out of Tuffnut's delusions on this one. 

Hiccup and Astrid search the house, but again find no circumstantial evidence. No sign of a forced entry and no footprints were left behind. This doesn't make any sense to them, but Ruffnut thinks she might know what this is. She suggests that it may not be a metal thief they're looking for, it's a ghost metal thief they're looking for. They decide to get the fuck out of that mad house as soon as possible and continue the search the next day. 

That night, the large clouds of fog return and go on another metal thieving spree. The fog makes it way into Hiccup's house and tries to drag him away by his metal leg. Toothless manages to grab hold of Hiccup and pull him away from the fog. He flaps his wings and blows the smoke away. 

Caught red-handed you little shits!

Hiccup has found his metal thief, or rather, his metal thieves! The Smother Smokebreaths make a break for it with all of Hiccup and Stoick's metallic shit. Including Hiccup's breastplate helmet that we haven't seen since forever. But Hiccup refuses to let his helmet get jacked! Toothless blasts a bitch and the Smokebreath's book it. 

In the morning, the rest of the village realises they've been hit once again. Astrid is missing her shoulder pads and the others are missing their helmets. Tuffnut thinks he's managed to draw a picture of the thief this time. He shows a picture of himself, it take the others a few minutes before Tuffnut gets it. 

Hiccup drops by and tells everybody that the thieves are Smothering Smokebreaths. Stoick wanders how Smokebreath's got on the island, since they don't wander too far from Breakneck Bog. They get a pretty good idea when Gobber runs up complaining that all the metal he had and the scrap metal he bought are missing. 

Hint: It's this Guy!

Johann is sitting with some villagers sharing more of his lame ass stories. Stoick and Hiccup approach him and interrogate him. They demand to know where he got the scrap metal. Johann says that he likes to keep his purchases confidential, but Stoick ain't having non of that businessman crap and snarls at Johann. Johann is clearly intimidated as any smart person would be. He tells them that he acquired the metal from a Berserker who was selling it a price he couldn't turn down. With all the information they need, Stoick and Hiccup depart, Toothless gives Johann an aggressive growl.   

The situation is Berk is a total disaster just waiting to happen. Everywhere they look, everybody's everyday tools are falling apart. Gobber does an inventory on the armoury, the axe handles outnumber the axes by a long shot. Stoick realises that this would be a very opportune time for Dagur to strike at Berk. Aside from a few dragons, they're completely defenseless. 

Hiccup gathers the Teens into the arena as he always does when shit like this comes up. He knows what they have to do, find those pesky Smokebreaths and get their weapons back so they can plunge them into Dagur's balls when he lands on their shores! Tuffnut is still crying over Macey and hopes she won't be all alone out there. Snotlout brought out his spare helmet, and Hiccup has a plan on how to find the Smokebreath's, since they're most likely on Berk. They'll gather all the metal they have left and leave it in the arena, then follow the Smokebreath's back to their hideout. Astrid asks if they're gathering all the metal.

Wait, what do you mean . . . all the metal?

   
The teens gather up all the metal that's left and place it in the middle of town, including Snotlout's spare helmet. He wanted to use Hiccup's leg instead, to which Hiccup refused, to which Snotlout suggested they flip a yak pie over it, to which Hiccup once again refused. They wait until the Smokebreath's show up, which they do as expected. Hiccup tells Snotlout and Fishlegs to wait for his signal, then the Twins fuck up his perfect plan by firing at the Smokebreath's ahead of time. 

The Smokebreath's make a break for it, the the Teens hot on their trail. These Smokbreath's turn out to be sneaky little bastards however, constantly outwitting Hiccup and Toothless. Eventually they manages to disable Toothless' tail, forcing Toothless and Hiccup to crash. Hiccup manages to use his shield's grapple hook before they crash. 

Hiccup spots the thieving little shit that stole the connecting rod. Hiccup and Toothless chase his ass down, until Hiccup manges to hook it it with his grappling hook. Although, that doesn't turn out as well as he thought it would. 

I'm immediately regretting this decision!

Toothless manages to bite down on Hiccup's leg (not his metal leg mind you) and pull him back from the Smokebreath, who also drops the connecting rod. As a nice little bonus, they also find the location of the Smokebreath's nest! Hiccup quickly tries to gather up the teens, but Astrid finds him first. He tries to tell her about the Smokebreath nest, but she says it'll have to wait, as they've got far bigger problems. 

Not far from Berk, Dagur's fleet is high tailing it towards the village. Dagur can hardly believe that a bunch of little, pesky scavengers managed to bring Berk to its knees. Savage however claims that it was his idea, but when Dagur threatens him with violence Savage says he probably stole it from Dagur. Dagur is contemplating his certain victory with eager anticipation.    

Pucker up Hiccup! Cuz you're about to become my bitch!

Hiccup looks through his spyglass and sees Dagur's armada. He wanders if Dagur goes anywhere without it. Well, when you have an armada motherfuckers know you mean business. I'd bring it with me wherever I went. So the town has a dilemma on their hands, they need weapons but the Smokbreath's have them. They can't exactly fight them and bring them back before it's too late, and Snotlout has a stupid idea to attack Dagur with only 5 Dragons. 

Tuffnut suggests they cut themselves in half, then there'll be twice as many of them. Astrid asks that he use his head before using his mouth from now on. But Hiccup thinks he's actually on to something. Not the cutting in half crap, but the greater numbers part of that logic. Hiccup thinks he knows a way he can turn Dagur's plan on itself. He tells the villagers to gather up all the metal they can find. Gobber makes his contribution with his hook, he gutted his first Outcast with it. 

The teens drag huge sacks of metal to the Smokebreaths nest. This gets their attention, well that and The Twins making a racket and shouting obscenities. They lure the Smokebreath's toward the ocean. While that's going on, Dagur's fleet is closing in on Berk. Dagur is pacing around impatiently, he thinks there's should be ass-kissing by now. 

QUEER!

As the teens bring the metal towards Dagur's fleet, the Berserkers lock and load for indiscriminate pwning, and Stoick and the villagers arm themselves with whatever they can get their hands on. Logs, fish, boulders, the works. The sudden arrival of Hiccup and the academy will make all that shit unnecessary in a few minutes. 

They bring the metal and the Smokebreaths to Dagur's fleet, and drop their loads onto it. Dagur is confused, he catches a spoon and theorises that perhaps it's a spoon of surrender. Right before a Smokebreath grabs it from his hand. He watches the Smokebreath's dismantle his ships all around him. They leave not a single nail or screw, because they're greedy little bastards. Dagur's fleet sinks, leaving him stranded on a little board. He shoves Savage off because he thinks Savage is a total queer. 

This isn't over Hiccup! You will be my bitch!

With Dagur gone and Tuffnut reunited with macey, now the only thing left to do is deal with the Smokebreath's. Stoick asks Hiccup how he plans on doing that, Hiccup has found an unwilling volunteer who owes them a debt. And that unwilling volunteer would be Trader Johann, who got them into this shit in the first place. 

The teens place the scrap metal on Johann's ship, Johann begs Hiccup to find another solution, Hiccup tells Johann to go fuck himself, and the next stop is Breakneck Bog. 

Summary

The beginning of the episode was very CSI like, with the mystery and the investigating and Tuffnut provided some pretty good comic moments. It was kinda obvious that it was Smothering Smokebreath's, but it was still pretty awesome to see them again, ad the smoke effects were a lot better this time around. 

Dagur's plan to use the Smokebreath's to disarm Berk was very clever and it almost worked. It created another almost dire situation, but Hiccup of course came up with a clever counter to that plan. Dagur, as always, was a riot. 

My only problem is the number of dragons the budget could allow, or at least that's what I assume the problem was. Where are all the dragons from before? Where's Thronado? If these dragons were mentioned, the story of this episode might have gone differently. But I suppose because of budget constraints, they probably couldn't include them. 

8/10